flash update: ride the SOUL train

I have now confirmed, if my life's journey continues on its current path, where my soul will be crushed in to infinitesimally minute particles and scattered by the solar winds throughout the universe, never to be reunited for time immemorial.

It will be like an over-long freight train barrelling through a defunct railyard, scattering debris and flotsam to the farthest reaches its turbulent slipstream can muster. The final bit of my soul will be like a poorly placed penny on the tracks to be shot out like a bullet and lodged in a dark and dank corner to be lost forever; never to be found, never to be retrieved.

The hilarious part though? It will all be in the slowest of motions. Taking no less than a decade. Most likely that and one half as long. Even more hilarious? My personally expected natural life span will continue on for no less than seven more decades after that. Yup, I expect and plan a ridiculously long life.

Of course, there are those with pickaxes and blow-torches and the like, hacking and chipping away at my spirit. That is nothing. I can hear the bell chiming at the crossing. I can hear the whistle of the train blowing. They are painfully loud and drawn out. I even know their names, they start with a consonant and end with a consonant; one is a palindrome. Those are the only clues you get though. #;o[)>

I guess the Grim Reaper will surprised when she finally comes to collect. I will most likely be charged to wander this crumbling orb to the end of the cosmos's days. I might just change my name to Casca (this is a very obscure reference, by the way).

Meh, it could be worse.

Slime and wave!

blbbl

? regret - raw poem

As with the images in this post, the following poem is raw: sudden, unrefined, unedited (somewhat like me currently). I scribbled this thing down on Monday just before the start of the clock job. I have not looked at it again until now. With a snatch of time I am throwing this up here as was scribbled.

sunrise, monday morning

my soul fractures

my soul crumbles

it does not vanish

regret

unfathomable

i have done things

     that embarrass me

i have done things

     that make me proud

i have dome things

     that amaze me

i have done things

     that make me shake my head

i have done things (and do)

     that i hate

resentment

now that's the ticket

to regret

     is to hate who you are

i cannot

to resent

     is to hate what you

          have done

          are doing

          will do

nevertheless

everything one

     has done

     does

     will do

is who you

     were

     are

     will be

how can you not want to be

     who you are

(how can i loathe myself)

     (sometimes it is hard not to)

i do not

i cannot

fogrise #1, thursday morning (today) [my favourite]

fogrise #2

#3

blbbl

away away . i eschew the embrace

the woodland

it calls to me

yet

like a preteen boy

at a school dance

i vacillate

turn away

and

pursue avoidance

why

do i deny myself

that which i love

most dearly

blbbl

taking a break

So, I know I have not posted since the beginning of the month, but it has been a weird and hellacious thirty-one days.

The new clock job has kicked the crap out of me. A Sith, by the name of Darth Numbnuts, has been dogging me for almost a year and matters came to a head this month.

Several disappointments since just before the winter solstice, culminating with the final one I wish to (not) accept on this very day.

Multiple other brooding issues and, somewhat surprising, revelations. An unavoidable (only as I have failed to overcome) isolation from the woodland.

All this, and more, has put me in a space where I need to reflect upon and analyse myself, surroundings, and interactions. There is yet more than I care to confront.

Too bad, as I had/have a few posts brewing, with notes and drafts, that I wish to put out.

Unfortunately, I have convinced myself that I need to step back, take a break, and pause from the rooster.

That is correct, I am not going to post for an indeterminate period of time. I cannot focus on the rooster right now.

My break may be a day, a week, a month, longer? I may drop a comment now and again in the interim, I may not.

I apologise to my handful of dedicated followers, but it would be an injustice to the rooster and yourselves if I force it. You few, committed, fellow travellers will know when the rooster is back to disturb your slumber.

One last parting shot: Darth Numbnuts, take a flying leap off the back of something unmentionable. Oh, and get bent, you self-serving ass. blbbl

jobbing the clock - five days - week in review

So, I think this is almost out of my system. As a new (again) thing for me. I actually had all kinds of "stuff" I was going to cover, but much has left my mind. It happens sometimes. Some of you know why, some of you do not. Oh well.


Work: Getting used to it, more and more.

No choice really. 

There is one unexpected perk.

In the latter part of the week, a box appeared on the shop floor. 

It said "free stuff".

Yup.

I took a casual gander; various crap.

There was a monitor too; I may grab it on Monday if it still there.

It is probably not so good; but the members of my Scout Troop that are going to the Great Lakes Jamboree this summer are doing an e-waste fundraiser in April.

I can add that to the pile.

I think I will call this occasional "free stuff": "Employment Bonuses"; it sounds classier.

The job does give my mind lots of time to ponder. I may have to get a voice recorder to note my thoughts before I forget them.


Socks: All the socks came in!

I was right about them; the one pair was of the smaller size, the others were thick and tall and actual work socks.

I did try on the "too small" socks and oddly they fit, albeit a tad un-tall.

I will wear these thinner ones, tall-ish and un-tall, for now and save the thick and tall ones for later.

Still not impressed with The Bay though.


Boots: I have yet to follow up on that.

For the love of my feet, I better soon as my feet are unhappy.

These old boots do not have a lot of life left in them either.

Hopefully this week sometime I will get new foot-coverings and the old ones will become yet another pair of truck boots.


My clothes jumble: Still a clothes jumble.

Another thing to move on as I know I have more crappy tee-shirts; I just cannot find them.

As with my hiking/camping socks, I will not sacrifice my hiking/camping shirts, or any hiking/camping clothing, for non-hiking/camping activities.


Well, there you have it.

I do not foresee a change on the horizon for a long time.

I just need to get my ducks in a row before they peck me to death.


I am sure most of you are relieved that I may just leave this topic for a bit.


I have a few, maybe even a bunch, of other irons in the fire as to topics to post about.

I just need to remember to remember them properly and restart taking notes, or, at least, give myself reminders.


Busy day tomorrow, the boy and I, and a couple of others, are going to start that hiking shelter repair.

I think I mentioned that before?

The boy is repairing our home-turf hiking shelter as it is not much of a shelter any longer; it is like standing under a colander of draining pasta when it is raining.

He is doing this for his Chief Scout's Award, and the fact that he thinks a shelter should provide shelter.

I also hope to get back to searching for boots for work.

Maybe even unjumble the jumble.

Plus, Daylight Savings Time comes in to effect overnight.

Spring ahead and lose an hour.


So, a very busy, and one hour shorter, day tomorrow.


Amazing though, how something as simple as work or socks, can weigh a person down at times?


Boogie on down the Road.


See you on the trail! blbbl

travailler á l'horloge - jour quatre - chaussettes!

So, for those who find my "French" incomprehensible, it is now day four with my jobbing the clock.

Things are better.

As the wife said, I appear "happier" today than all week.

I guess I am getting subsumed? enmeshed?

I am apparently there to stay. (I better get those boots!)

I have been offered overtime.

A standing offer, in fact.

Every Saturday, from early in the morning (before the Monday to Friday start time) until daytime-midnight (not my creation; a phrase a good friend of mine introduced me to).

Unfortunately, this Saturday is out; too many things are a juggling this weekend.

However, I know I will be in on more Saturdays than I can currently fathom.

Oh, yeah, the suggestion yesterday of sweeping during lulls was taken up by myself today.

I know a work area has to be kept clean and tidy, but I always find sweeping to keep, or look, busy somewhat foolish. 

Anyway, much of the floor around my work area is spotless, none the less.

I will come to terms with it all. 

As I have said, it is not where I thought I would be at this point in my life, but I  am here (there am I?)...


Hey, the first parcel of socks has come in!

They actually were at the Post Office waiting for me...


I have just opened the package...


Five pairs of socks!


Not what I ordered?!


Three pairs are the advertised size, but not the advertised socks.

Two pairs are the advertised socks, sort of, but woefully too small; they will go to the boy and the wife.

Just not really worth the hassle to send them back.

By the way, these socks were ordered from The Hudson's Bay Company (aka: "The Bay") off their website.

So, beware; you may just not get what you thought you were buying.

Also, they are supposed to be wool work socks; yeah no.

They are wool, but thinner than what I would accept as a work sock, but I will muddle through, for now - they were free-ish.

So, the next two parcels will be interesting.

The next one I should get is five socks again, but from a different manufacturer. So, hopefully, thicker and the right sizing?

The third package will most likely be the thin sock and too small. (I will never buy that brand again!)

If they ask for feedback, boy will they get it; in spades!

Online shopping is awesome!?


May we sight each other on the flipside!

I will be the guy tugging at his socks.


See you on the trail, here's hoping. blbbl

clock jobbing - the third day

"Hey, the crybaby's back!"

You bet.

"When will he stop?"

Soon.

"Well, what do you want now?"

Oh, just to check in.

Taking a very short pause after getting home and before making dinner and before our weekly Scout meeting.

The meeting will be a busy one. We are "linking" with one of our Wolf Cub Packs tonight.

There will be over fifty youth tonight.

I suspect I will not have time to stand still.

Anyway, today was better, but the other shoe dropped.

The ubiquitous, "If you have nothing to do for a bit, grab a broom."

I am surprised it took three days for that bit of instruction to be passed on.

Well, right now, too darned busy to sweep, except where unavoidable for safety or maintenance.

Other than that, not so much a terrible day.

Anyway, on to supper and Scouts. I will finish up later.


Holy crap! That meeting was somewhat chaotic!

So, to let everyone know, the socks I ordered are in transit.

Yup. In three separate parcels!?

From three different locations!?

From one retailer!?

I need to find new boots for this job too. That is the next search.

The boots I currently have are just killing my feet.

I mean, my dogs are barking!

These hush-puppies have gone well past their best before date.

The boots I wanted to get are no longer made. So, online for that now.

Oh, I will find my way to bed eventually.

I better, or I will end up crashing to the floor.

Keep on truckin'.

See you on the trail, hopefully. blbbl

clock job - day two

So, upon reflection over yesterday's post, there are probably many of you thinking:

"Boo-hoo, he has to work fixed hours at a fixed location. Everyday. Boo-hoo-hoo."

Well, you are not wrong.

"Tough luck!"

True enough, again.

"What a whiner."

Well, maybe a little.

However, everybody does not fit in the same slot as everybody else.

I have known people who cannot, or are even unwilling to, take permanent employment. They like always not knowing what will happen next.

I have known people that could not make it outside of the military. They needed that kind of structure and oversight.

I have known people who work for themselves. They just cannot abide others telling them what to do or they think they can do it better on their own.

I have known people that went to and from work at the same time every day at the same place every day. It worked for them, always knowing when, where, and what they were doing.

I have known people that just drift along with the current of the universe. They just love the universe to surprise them. Probably more fun than not too.

I have known many very different and various people who fit in to many various and different slots in the work-world. Some fit happily, some did not.

Me, I no longer know what slot I need to fit in to. I just did not think it would be this one.

Anyway, it is quite an adjustment for me. I actually was out with boy for a few hours and just got back. I am running sixteen to eighteen hours, and more, non-stop the last several days before I can take a breather. Tomorrow is much the same.

Honestly, I am baffled at how people can work a clock job for decades.

Two days in and I can barely stay awake. And I have had them before!

Well, my hat is off to all who do it. Willingly and reluctantly.

This is the new me, I guess. I certainly will adjust. I always do in the end.

Well, I have more bits and bobs to do before bed. 

Yesterday, it was confusedly ordering socks online with gift cards as I do not have enough in good repair to get through the week. I am certainly not using my hiking/camping socks; those are for the woodland.

Tonight, it is laundry. As I said, I need socks, and tee-shirts. Somehow, my clothing in general has become a jumble. I will need to take some time on the weekend, among all my other tasks, to find what the hell is going on in the hamper.

Tomorrow? Something will pop up.

Well, as I said earlier, this is the new me: clock jobber, and all the "rights and privileges" that go with it.

Don't cry for me Argentina!

With hope: See you on the trail. blbbl

clock job

So, something new-ish for me today.

I started a regular job.

Well, sort of; I did, but not fully yet.

I showed up to this new job today and spent most of the day in training and paperwork.

I actually, in the end, spent less than two hours "working", counting breaks.

The funny thing is, I actually stayed a bit late. The guy I was working with was not completely done at the buzzer (yes, an actual buzzer), so I, personally, could not just leave on him.

Anyway, this is very different from many jobs I have had over the years.

It is a true and solid clock job.

That is, a fixed start time, a fixed end time, a fixed work locale.

I have had them before, but many clock-type jobs I have had in the past had many liberties, or freedoms, if you will.

I could move my start and end times around, I could work off-site, I could, generally, choose what days to work.

I have also had more rigid clock jobs as well, but it has been a very, very long time.

Honestly, I never thought I would end up in a true clock job again.

Well, I have, it was not so bad, but I am limited in many options I have freely exercised for a good many years.

In particular, access to the woodland will be very limited to me; that will be tough.

Recently, I found a fantastic coffeeshop that I could do much of my other, sedentary, pursuits from; that avenue is shut to me now, except, if on a weekend I need to change venues from my home.

Too bad, I just started a book exchange thing, with the coffeshop as the "drop"; good thing I left a parcel just yesterday.

It is not that I hate it (the clock job, not the coffeeshop) or despise it. It is just I did not really see a return to this type of employment.

I know not if my new employer is aware the rooster. They should, if they researched me.

However, I cannot concern myself with that; I am who I am.

The rooster is an extension of myself now; even if, currently, I am posting much less frequently.

I have no intention to reveal my new place of employment, for so many reasons; we both need our confidentiality and arm's length from each other.

Sorry, but that is how it is; in my "me" link with my bio (which needs some tweaking and updating), I do say I will not tell all, nor will I lie about myself either.

So, there.

You will have to excuse me though; I have homework; more paperwork to complete for the clock job.

Plus, I need to resolve myself to this new path I am on.

Probably for a very long time indeed. (The clock job, not the resolution. Then again...)

See you on the trail; I hope. blbbl

a killer supper

Okay. Some years back, I took part in one of those murder mystery dinner parties. The ones you did at someone's home before restaurants, whose business was flagging, started doing them in an attempt to forestall bankruptcy.

Here is a brief telling of that event:


So, it was thrown by the girlfriend, at the time, of my best friend. She did not like me very much and most of the people there were her friends that he had already met.

So, I felt a little weird being invited and it was supposed to be a surprise too. She called and asked if I would come. I said I would and we got our characters ahead of time. I think in the mail. The setting was turn of the last century or so and I was a bartender in a saloon/tavern, where the murder took place.

Me being me, I took my part seriously. I read my physical and psychological description several times. I secured a white bar-style apron, a bar towel to sling over my shoulder, a striped shirt with big sleeves, my dad had a pair of sleeve garters for some reason, which I used and I still have, the works.

Sadly, it takes me a very long time to grow significant facial hair. (Probably as I am an immortal of the woodland, it keeps one quite youthful; but that is another tale altogether.) No way I was going to grow enough of a moustache for the role in the time I had.

So, being pre-interweb, I called all kinds of places and drove around to all kinds of locales. In the end, I think I ended up in St. Catherines or Niagara-on-the-Lake; bear in mind this is heading out from Hamilton, not so very far, but certainly not close. I bought a really cool soup-catcher that was close-ish to my hair colour at the time. Hell, I even slicked my hair back as it was longish at the time too.

We all got to the dinner ahead of my friend and he was quite surprised by the reception; especially by my presence as he knew of his gal's dislike for me. Anyway...

At the dinner party we got more of the scenario and the guilty party was informed in their final document package. Only the murderer knew, not even the hostess had an inkling.

There was much back and forth. There were accusations. There was deflection. Shouting. Outright lying. Fingers were pointed in many directions. Yet, other than a couple/few idle comments, no one suspected the true killer. Right to the end.

All but one in the dinner party selected the same person as the murderer, with much assistance from the actual doer of the deed. The lone person, some joker, stood out with their selection. They were so way off in the end, one had to laugh. Some did, including the murderer. The rest? As I stated earlier, were utterly wrong as well.

When the last bit of the documentation was opened stating the who-done-it, all but one were in disbelief. This criminal mastermind had fooled all. Some demanded to read the card revealing the truth for themselves. That is how convincing this blaggard was. To be able to sway all, that it was not themself who was the actual culprit. To hook all but one, that it was a particular individual? Dare I say they were a mastermind? A genius? I dare! And applaud their confidence and audacity.

In fact, the murderer, in true bizzaro-world fashion, turned the tables with one of the earliest known reverse "Scooby-doo ending" admissions of guilt. Yet, there was still much disbelief and many were agog at this adroit assassin's prowess at guile, subterfuge, and outright trickery.

I think some, to this day, still do not believe the declared and official result to be so.

I can certainly say that that supper was a delight. blbbl

mobile phone dying - reseat your sim-card - sorry apple users, you lose

I previously discussed the travails of my mobile phone.

The battery was draining like crazy.

I tried various techniques I knew about or I discovered online. Shutting down unused apps that ran in the background, shutting down or reduced permissions on greedy apps, reseating my battery.

They worked. Sort of. These attempts were fleeting in results. I would execute them time and again, yet the problem of the rapid battery discharge kept returning and at times got worse. My phone actually crapped out after about four hours one day. At a time when I needed to be connected while on the move.

Funny though, because not so long ago in my planetary existence, I would just keep in touch through payphones, walkie-talkies, cork boards at cafés, prearranged rendezvous, and the like.

Now, I find myself more dependent on mobile telephone technology as a tool to move through the world. It is a boon and a curse simultaneously.

Anyway, when the phone crapped out that time, I was pretty pissed. It does not help that my phone has a(n) USB-C connector. I do not know about where you all are, but in my neck of the woods, it is very uncommon. It is very difficult for me to cadge someone's charger to salvage my link to the world.

I did in the end, finally find the correct cable connection, but by then, it was academic. I was at the end of my day's tasks and nearly on my way home.

At this point, I started carrying what I call juice boxes: portable power packs, or power banks. Still, my phone was drinking at an alarming rate.

I resolved to go to where I bought the phone to see if they knew why this was all happening. Yet, I could not find the time to get there. Hell, I have been so blooming busy this past month, I have only posted once in this month of February.

During one of my bouts of insomnia, I was tooling around the interweb, hoping I would find that eureka site that would reveal all I needed to solve this mystery. I came across a page that said to remove the sim-card and and reseat it.

Honestly, I did not take much stock in it. Yet, I noticed that while running diagnostic software, I would get messages about weak wifi signals affecting performance. I figured, initially, that it was the boy with is multitude of tech bellowing back and for over the ethersphere.

However, the problem persisted when the boy was not trying to take over the world or I was at other locations using wifi.

Finally, a couple of days ago, in the middle of the night, or was it in the wee hours of the morning? Anyway, I did exactly what this site said to do. I pulled the sim-card out and reseated it. Voilà! The crazy-assed, super-speedy battery draining stopped. It was just like when I first got my phone. I looks like I can go for a couple or few days without a recharge! I even left the phone off the charger overnight and it only went down a percent or two.

So, a simple fix it appears. And perchance a touch of magic(k). No conspiracies, at least in this case. I certainly know the Gnomes are helping me out here and there. I had a leather punch I could not find for months. Two days ago, it reappeared in a drawer that I have checked tens, dozens, hundreds of times without luck. Until the last time. Thanks guys!

Skynet is obviously busy elsewhere. The replicants have apparently determined I will be seen as a crank and a kook. Fine. Nothing new there. The squirrels though. Oh, the squirrels. Not done with those jokers, by a long shot.

Sorry, I digress.

So, this fix appears to work for phones that use removable sim-cards. As far as I know, Apple devices do not have that capability. Well, sorry and too bad. I am not a fan of Apple, I find their software largely counter-intuitive, much like how Microsoft appears to be trundling towards at an ever increasing pace.

Anyhoo, I appear to have solved the Hardy Boys Mystery of the Rapidly Draining Telephonic Device. Now, if I can only figure out what happened to my scarves (aka scarfses) that vanished, yes vanished, at an event. I am so pissed and upset about that still. blbbl

let's do lunch?!

Yeah, so, sorry for the tardiness in posting. Been a busy couple of weeks. So, here we go...


This whole thing of meeting people for lunch. I just do not seem to get it.

You see on television, especially soap opera type shows, and in the movies, people going out for lunch together during the workday. In some inconceivable way, they manage to do this and lead fulfilling, successful careers.

Yet, somehow, whenever I have attempted such endeavours, the day is lost. Not necessarily a bad thing. However, for me, meeting people for lunch is at least a two hour affair. If not at least a full-half-working day. (Conceptualise that one!)

How can people "do lunch" regularly and still keep their jobs? Obviously, I need to live in one of the many alternate dimensions or universes where time moves at a slower pace, but people move at the same pace we do here.

However, the intrigue of a soap opera life would just knock the crap out of me. All those affairs, murder plots, diabolical corporate takeovers, having a relationship with your half-sibling and not knowing it, gorillas kidnapping my wife? Just not my cup of tea, as they say.

Even just going to lunch with co-workers? How can you go out and get your work done?


Oh wow!?


I started this post on Friday, then I had some tasks away from home and did not get back to it right away. I tried to re-engage on Saturday, got busy again and had to let it sit. Sunday, holy mac! I was away all day, some Scouting stuff, some personal stuff, then the day was over.

Now it is Monday. Afternoon. Again, I was swamped all morning and now, I appear to have a window to get this done. We will see if I can finish this. It has been too long since I yammered on the interweb.


So, where was I?


Oh. Yeah. So. Going out to lunch with co-workers. In the past, when I have had clock-jobs, I have gone out for lunch with my fellow cubicle-internees. The typical process is as follows.

Getting there: approaching a half hour to get to the rendezvous. Sit down and order: near on another thirty minutes. Scarf down the vittles and settle-up, another one-forty-eighth of the day. Get back to our boxes, same as the first leg. So, as much as two full hours and probably longer. Why were we never fired for job abandonment?

That is just going with co-workers out for a generally crappy lunch. Now, if you try to organise with someone who works a different clock-job from you.....All I can say is that it is a huge production to figure it all out. Actually, I can say more...


Who are you going out to lunch with? Are they near your pen, or is their labour-preserve situated in a geographically distant workforce terrain?

Far away? Do you meet near their work-zoo or yours? Do you meet somewhere in the middle where there may be a strange and unknown resto-topography?

Nearby? Are their any neutral feeding grounds where you would not be encroached upon by either of your fellow inmates?

Or perhaps, you work in a desolate wasteland and have no choice but to forage afar regardless, thereby forcing you to search for a culinary safe-haven away from your natural territorial range?

Driving? Do you pick-up, get picked up, or converge upon the kill separately? Is traffic a bear? (ha!) Is parking a whole new adventure?

Walking? Are environmental conditions going to affect your temporary exodus? Does a straight-line walking distance deceptively appear shorter and faster, but only leaves you stranded in the middle of a multi-lane migratory route hoping that the lights will change soon, and long enough, to favour the boldness of your fitness-minded choice to hoof it?


So, now that all that has been weighed, measured, and most likely found wanting in the end, you are at your pasture. What now?

You can see the table you want, you can smell whatever is wafting out of the kitchen. Ah, but here is the catch. Were you far ahead enough of the other grazers that you are at the head of the line? Are there any free tables? Sadly, the usual result is the need to wait and fidget for an indeterminate time.

When, finally, you have been allowed to get your place at the trough, the often agonising process of getting service begins. How attentive is your keeper? How overwhelmed are they? How quickly can you decide on your consumables?

Get through all that have you? Now what? There is of course more. How long is it going to take for your slop-buckets to arrive? Is it the right slop-bucket? Is your water dish getting emptied faster than it is being replenished? Oh, have you managed to keep your appetite? 

Now, after scarfing down your sustenance, you need to pay the piper. Right? I have, at times, had to wait longer to pay for my sins, than it took to gobble down my Reuben sammy, fries, and paltry dill pickle spear in the first place.

At this point, is generally the easiest part. Hacking your way back to your corral. Or? Is it? Really? You may need to consider if anyone is still at the maze. If it is not quite that late, is it late enough that it would be really obvious you have been on the feed-bag for a really long time? Could it be better to slink back to your personal hovel and just show up the next day brighter and earlier before first viewing? Take that chance to catch up and mull over a hard to question cover-story?


At this point you are probably rethinking how much you really enjoyed that so-so sandwich with the incorrect, and store-bought, condiment that was slathered all over, despite your request to have it on the side. That is why the universe invented Tupperware in the first place. So, you can bring stuff from home and munch away at your homemade hay bale.

So, I no longer "do lunch", unless I am on holiday, vacation, visiting, or plain dodging responsibility. I just do not have a watch with enough hours on it.


You know, what started as something pithy and a bit innocent, really turned in to a bitter monologue about being co-opted by living to work instead of working to live. I wonder if there really is some deeper subtext here? Nah. Maybe... Nah. Well... Never mind, I am too tired and hungry from this whole thing. Want to go out for a bite to eat? blbbl

sniffle, cough, FVMNEGNJKLEBNJKL;QEGVB!

I am sick. 

Quite sick actually.

I hate being sick.

The boy brought home some plague variant.

It took a week to get the filthy beast attached to me, but it is now living in my lungs.

It notched up a few days ago. 

Sneezing, oddly, then coughing.

Then more of both.

Then lots of mucous.

I retaliated with lots of tea with honey and cup-o-soup, no honey.

It is doing its darnedest to shut me down, but I am stubborn.

I even managed a couple of hikes this weekend; one with the Scout Troop.

One thing I noticed, is that while out in the woodland, I feel great.

Sure, I am still coughing, but not so bad.

One thing that sucks, is when I sneeze, I cannot help but speak in some ancient, unrecorded language.

The same often when I cough.

Hence, the title.

I think it means: "THIS SUCKS! I HATE BEING SICK; WHY ME?!?!?!"

Another thing that sucks?

The sneezing and coughing is so intense, it brings on crushing headaches, verging on migraines.

The coughing has been so intense, that my ribs ache; they feel bruised.

When I feel a coughing fit coming on, I have a great fear and trepidation.

However, the reason I need to cough is that it feels like a squirrel, perhaps a badger, is trying to claw its way out through my windpipe.

Once the coughing starts and the chest and ribs ache even more, the trepidation is gone as my throat is temporarily relieved of its agony.

Sadly, it all comes back far too quickly along with the trepidation.

Some of my fits have been so intense that the wife and/or the boy come running in to the room to see if I am okay; as in: did I collapse on the floor?

The coughs started to be accompanied by inhalation wheezing yesterday and varies in intensity.

Because of this, I suspect I may have developed a bronchial infection.

Some years back, I was very prone to them and they led to pneumonia at least once a year.

This went on for a half-dozen-odd years.

Hopefully, this is not the case this time.

Well, I did break out the Cēpacol.

Hopefully, its magical healing properties take hold.

Otherwise, to paraphrase a protocol droid I am familiar with: " I'm doomed."

Now, for more tea with honey and cup-o-soup without.

Did I mention I was sick?

FVMNEGNJKLEBNJKL;QEGVB!*

*THIS SUCKS! I HATE BEING SICK; WHY ME?!?!?!

blbbl

sometimes techonlogy hates me - i think my phone is plotting against me

I have posted previously about my dislike for technology at times.

Well, the tables appear to have turned.

So, several days back my phone's battery was discharging at an alarming rate.

It started about six days ago.

First, I had to charge the phone twice in one day. This is extremely rare. Usually I am doing heavy-duty searching, reading news articles, and looking at some youtube videos.

This was not the case though.

The next day I had to charge my phone three times. Usage was actually quite low though. I went in to my settings and force stopped a bunch of stuff I was not actually using. I even shut down twitter. I have come across articles and bitching about it using a lot of juice of late.

No change. And, it was getting worse. I was getting only four or five hours by day three.

Then I physically disconnected the battery. It was a little better. Sort of. The first discharge took eight hours, but then everything went back to sucking all the juice in a few hours. I did try it again, and no real change.

Then I went in to my running services and hit stop on "google services". It got a bit better, but not much. I tried it again and a little better, but not much more.

Then. Then! Two days ago, it seemed the rapid discharging just stopped.

I went through that whole day with normal battery usage. I did not even put it on the charger overnight. About ten percent battery drain overnight. Well, the first two nights of this odyssey, the battery drained until the phone died. The first night I had around forty percent battery life left and it was dead in the morning. The second night it was sixty percent and it died before dawn.

After that, I left it charging. Only on Sunday night, two days ago, did it not discharge overnight while off the charger.

Yesterday, I had a meeting in the evening and wanted my phone to check my calendar and to be able to search if necessary. So, I charged it. I went down about six percent and I left it off the charger when I went to bed. Less than four percent discharge.

I toodled around this morning and it only went down a couple of percent. I was out all day, doing my regular thing and it went down only about twenty percent. Less, I think.

When I got home, I had about seventy percent charge and I started twitter up again and did some farting around. Right now. As in now! The phone is at forty-nine percent. Not sure if it is twitter or all the crap I have been doing on it.

I am monitoring it right now, but the first time I disable twitter, the battery still drained for days. I am starting to suspect it is twitter in allegiance with these so-called google services.

I am going to step back from the keyboard for a bit and keep an eye on my phone. But before I do, some theories.

If it is not some weird confluence of twitter and google, I have other theories.

First, even though there is supposed to be a détente between me and the gnomes, they may be playing a part. I am sure I have heard gnome laughter the last few days. That, and a few little things going on that would suggest I am being tested. Now, I am not accusing them. Yet. But I do know they can get bored. Guys: if it is you? Very funny. Can I have my phone's functionality back. Please? Pleeasse?!?!?

Theory number two. I may be getting skynetted. It has already happened once before. By the way, there are at least two companies out there called cyberdyne: this one and this one. This guy even adds another layer or two to the whole thing. Well, at least they should go after him first. It gives me some breathing room. Now, who's crazy? Not me. Well....., not because of this.

Theory three. Replicants. (Hey, do not fall for that reference to them being fictional. As if? Next there will be an entry about cyborgs not being real too.) But I have said too much already. I need to put safeguards in place before I can even get in to anything about these guys. But be forewarned. They are among us and I have circumstantial, very circumstantial, proof, so there.

Distant theory four. Squirrels. I think I need not say any more on this topic. Go through my posts about the Expanding Legion of Evil (ELoE). If anything, they are in collusion with one or more of the above mentioned parties. There is a whole posse hanging out at the back of the property these days. Not just the melantic (I use a really old version of the adjective I picked up from a book titled: The Sea & The Jungle: see!; a great book.) ones, which are more common, but also a full grey, and at least one brown squirrel. And not a chipmunk to be seen; who are known to be allies of my allies at times. Hmmm?!?

That should throw the replicants off my scent for now. Yeah, that's the ticket.

Anyway, before I step back for a bit, the phone is but at forty-eight percent. Time to monitor the situation before I may accidentally tip my hand. (I need to check my resources in the woodland as a fallback position.)


A couple of hours later and now I am at twenty-nine percent. However, I did a bunch of intensive stuff on the phone. There was yet another update for twitter, so I did. We will see if it eats more battery up. I may have to shut it (twitter, not the phone) down for a while. Which is sad, as there a few "twits" I follow that I like to see when they post, not many, and they tend to be infrequent, but I love when they do add to the interweb. I also added one new poster; see if she figures it out, as I suspect she runs her profile really lean.


A couple of more hours and only down by five percent for a whopping twenty-four percent battery life left. Something is certainly funky. Much less drainage in this period.

Normally, I am really quite very good at breaking this kind of ridiculousness and turning the interweb to my advantage. Sadly, or more so, inevitably, it has become much less fun to dismantle software and technology to fix it or bend it to one's will. The interweb is so polluted now, searches that should be quick, easy, and simple, become a death march through junk and false metadata. Hell, it took me ages to figure out how to link to a youtube video at a specific time frame. Partly out of laziness, but really more from despising the overwhelming amounts of shizzle in the ethersphere. And laziness.

So, I will plod along slowly with this, most likely, simple puzzle. I am also moving towards the idea of detechnologising many facets of my life. I do like to blog, and I will find my rhythm and stay online for that. Probably need to get a new computerising device for that as my current Dell Latitude D520 with Windows XP is making motions to retire. Too bad, great notebook. If chromebooks were not so pricey..... However, I do have two portable typewriters. I think I may write for the drawer, as was said behind the iron curtain, for a bit too. I will use the interweb to get some ribbons for those suckers. Oh, and acid free paper..... I wonder if I can find linen paper, like books used to be published with.

I also like being able to communicate in writing from remote locations, but I do not need the tons of apps I currently have. Being able to call too, especially if stranded or broken down without having to walk several kliks is handy.

Tracking my hikes is handy, but I really do not need it, it is just a nice-to-have add-on. Same with GPS; I have plenty of roadmaps and am acquiring more. Just need to finish the American mid-west, Texas and the US West Coast. Plus Mexico. I also know how to read roadsigns.

I must say the phone-camera is nice to have. It saves me from getting a camera-only device. But I want one of the those pocket printers, but that is more for fun stuff, especially with the Scouts. It can be nice to be polaroidesque at times. Worst case, I always wanted to get a fully-manual film-camera. Maybe the wife remembers how to develop film?

Well, obviously, I will be cleansing my phone and seeking some additions to my low-tech arsenal of aids and conveniences.


So, how much later is it now? Oh, about two hours again and the phone is down to six, no, five percent. However, I was dinking around a lot in the settings and other stuff. Not a bad sign actually. A couple of days ago and the phone would have died in a couple of minutes after that.

So, more experimenting. And also to figure out why some apps restart themselves, when they should not be doing that. Oh, the deleting will begin. I am reminding myself as well, that a mobile phone is a tool to be used as necessary, like a pocketknife. It is not a lifestyle.


Wow. I started in on how technology is turning on me. Went on to a bunch of conspiracy theories (or maybe not). What next? Oh yeah, going on about how tech failures and the like was looked upon as a challenge once, but more a burden now. Finally, eschewing technology, at least some of it; mostly post 1999 type-stuff.


If that has not thrown the replicants off my trail, I do not know what will. Have a better one. blbbl