What?!
You ask?
Two of you? And it took that long?!
Yup.
The reason though, is that, not only did we shovel the laneway and the walkway, we also shovelled the lawn.
Well, I cut the boy loose partway through that part. So, I did a good chunk of the lawn myself.
What?!
You ask?
You shovelled the lawn?!
Yup.
The reason though, is that, in years past, we have often run out of room as to where to put all the snow from the laneway and walkway. It reaches a point where I cannot shovel it over the big giant-assed mound that gets formed over the winter or the snow blower cannot throw it over.
Besides, the snowblower is crapped out right now.
So, we (I) pushed all the snow to the outer edges of the property. Right over top the swales.
Now there is lots of room for more snow to be moved. And, as it seems that all the snow that fell in the Ottawa Valley has landed on and around the house, I am going to need that room for future snowfalls.
It was funny though. People slowed down to look at us/me doing it. Well, that may be a solution to all the assclowns that race down our street without stopping at the stop signs. Doing something bizarre and/or eccentric out in the front of the house. One guy, in a truck with a huge trailer drove around the block and past the house at least four or five times!
The one neighbour engaged me in conversation, as I think he may have thought I was having a stroke or an episode of dementia and wanted to be sure that I would not be found facedown on our green lawn hours later.
The wife came out and asked why I was shovelling the grass. When I gave my official reason, she asked if I lost my mind. She came out a bit later and accused me pointedly of being crazy. Then! Then, she disrupted my work by tapping on the bay window and made the universally recognised crazy sign and pointed at me. Me!
What?!
You ask?
Yeah, right. Crazy like a fox!
There is another good reason to pile the snow on the edges of the property..... Anti-zombie fortifications!!
Everyone knows that zombies cannot handle the cold. There is no way they are going to try to tackle my defensive snow berms. They are just going to go around the house and I can pick them off at my leisure with the sling shot while they shuffle down the road.
Just in case there are any go-getters in the herd, I left a small and narrow choke point at a corner of the house they could use where I can nail them from the front porch.
Somewhat to that, I have a friend who, now several times, in writing, has called me weird, odd, and the like. Well, you know, that is okay.
Hey, I would rather be seen as odd, weird, eccentric, or even in the vein of: "Don't worry. Just keep your hands and feet away from his mouth. You'll be okay."
Crazy though? That is a whole different set of meds.
This same friend has an interesting perspective. I had mentioned safety concerns for an event and jokingly referred to it as being prepared for the end of the world. She, in no uncertain terms, stated that the world is always coming to an end. And there is no such thing as an apocalypse.
I do not disagree on either point. However..... On the first, one must determine how the world is currently ending. Hence, my anti-zombie snow berms. Just in case that particular conflagration occurs ahead of schedule and not this spring. On the second point, apocalypse is, of course, so passé, at least since the early 70s. As I mentioned in regards to the first point, it is conflagration that is the concern. Not just what, if, and/or when, but how many and the amount of overlap.
I think I am digressing.....
What?! You?!?!?!
You ask?
Nevermind (or is it "never mind"). Now, where was I?.....
Besides, if I do not shovel the snow off the grass, as I said to the neighbour: How am I supposed to trim the lawn?
Absolutely outrageous. blbbl
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