If you do not like them or are offended, suck it up. They are just jokes.
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Why do to the French line their roads with trees?
The Germans like to march in the shade.
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Definition of heaven and hell:
Heaven: French cuisine, British policing, and German engineering.
Hell: French engineering, British cuisine, and German policing.
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Have you heard of the new Italian tank?
It has 3 forward gears....and 6 reverse.
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How do you get a one armed Polak out of a tree?
Wave to them.
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So, a rope goes in to a bar and the bartender says: "We don't serve your kind in here. Get out!"
The rope leaves, then comes back when it's busier and the bartender says: "Hey, I told you, we don't serve your kind in here. Get out!"
After a few more attempts and failures, the rope is standing out in the street and then suddenly throws himself down and rolls around and tatters himself and twists himself up in to a loop.
He goes back in and the bartender looks at him and asks: "Hey, aren't you the rope I already kicked out a bunch of times?"
The rope looks at him and says: " Nope. Frayed knot."
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Three couples, British, American, and Irish, are sitting together at a cafė and are chatting and such while having tea.
The British gentleman says to his wife: "Pass the honey, Honey." As an expression of his love for his wife.
The American fellow says: "Pass the sugar, Sugar." For much the same reason.
The Irishman, not so lovey-dovey with his wife, looks at her and says: "Pass the tea, Bag."
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Guy walks in to a public house in the early afternoon and sits at the bar and begins to drink beer after beer after beer.
He never decamps from the rail, and when the tavern closes, he settles up and leaves.
When he gets outside, he unzips and someone looking quite distraught says to him: "Hey, you can't pee here!"
The guy looks and him and then points off in to the distance and says: "I'm not going to pee here. I'm going to pee waaay over there."
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Have you heard of the new French military magazine?
It's called: White Flag - Soldier of Surrender.
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How do you confuse a Newfie?
Put him in a round room and tell him to pee in the corner.
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There's a guy at the side of the road beside a vehicle that has obviously broken down when a truck filled with a bunch of guys in an "altered" state pull up and one of them asks: "What's the trouble brother?"
He replies: "Piston broke."
The guy from the truck answers back: "Us too, get in."
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Do you know what a French bath is?
No?
That's okay, neither do the French.
(I may have made this one up. Not sure though.)
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A visual blonde joke, with some extras, watch timeframe 7:03-8:12. (Unfortunately, I could not find the specific clip and I do not know how to edit a video as yet.)
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Now, for my all-time favourite joke:
Why don't they have ice cubes in Poland?
They lost the recipe.
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